Body Sense

Summer 2011

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Communication is Key it is paramount for anyone with body issues, especially as a result of abuse, to feel comfortable communicating their needs. it can be very diffi cult for survivors to set the boundaries they need because of the very dynamics of abuse and its long- term effects. W hile you don’t need to feel compelled to share all your history with your therapist, do share any pertinent health history. Also let your therapist know beforehand, and throughout the massage, what you can and cannot tolerate. your therapist’s job is to listen to, and honor, those requests. to penetrate that great wall all in one session. As we left her offi ce that day, I cried quietly. I was unfamiliar with touch that was both nurturing and nonsexual. Most of the touch I had received up until then was either injurious, exploitative, or a prelude to sex. To experience healing touch was uncharted waters for me. WiDening THe bounDArieS Each subsequent session got easier and I started looking forward to seeing Susan. I widened the boundaries little by little as my trust grew and Susan and I would talk more and more. Over time, I gave her access to my arms and neck. Later, I allowed the massage to cover the area below my knees to my ankles. Eventually I learned to trust that Susan would never take me past my safety threshold. She was gently supportive and encouraging. Sometimes she would ask something like, “Do you think you want to try your feet today?” Saying yes got easier as I now felt safe in Susan’s hands. Sometimes the massage hurt, so I asked Susan if it was normal for there to be “pain.” She explained that a body free of injury and trauma—a completely balanced and healthy body—could take deep massage without discomfort. This allowed me to open the door for her to go deeper and further with the bodywork, a little at a time. I knew that if I did feel discomfort or pain, we were precisely at the place that needed healing. Even after months of bodywork with Susan, I had diffi culty tolerating massage on my thighs, especially on the front. She suspected that this area of my body was holding memories of a rape I experienced at the age of 14 (by now I had shared most of my life history with Susan). In one conversation, Susan pointed out the difference between our recent sessions and our fi rst appointments together. “The fi rst time you got on this table, I had never felt so much simultaneous fear and courage in someone’s body as I did in yours that day. Do you remember? I couldn’t move the muscles in your back.” In our months of work together, Susan could feel areas of my body letting go of painful experiences one by one. I felt it, too. PAy iT forWArD Through my experiences with Susan, a seed was planted. I could see myself as a massage therapist one day literally having a hand in someone else’s healing through bodywork. About 20 more years would pass before making this a reality and enrolling to become a massage therapist. Now, in my third year as a practicing massage therapist, I fi nd my work with other survivors of abuse to be especially rewarding. Always mindful of what Susan taught me about honoring every client, I am privileged to pass on the power of healing touch. B S Linda Maureen Sanches is a certifi ed massage therapist from California who discovered massage and bodywork as a client in her own healing journey years ago. Inspired by a skilled and caring massage therapist, Sanches studied advanced massage therapies at the World School of Massage and Holistic Healing Arts in San Francisco, California, and is dedicated to ongoing continued education. Visit her website at www.lindamaureensanchescmt.vpweb.com. summer 2011 Body Sense 11

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