Issue link: http://cp.revolio.com/i/244291
S haron Gordon works full-time and handles most household tasks since her husband, Mac, 57, was diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS, in November 2012. Their son works full time and their daughter is in college, but they help out when they can. Although situations differ, many caregivers face similar hardships. Finances might be tight, emotions and stress can run high, and time to care for themselves is sorely lacking. Oftentimes, caregivers develop health problems of their own. "Caregivers are at greater risk for stress and depression and, as a result, increased illness," says Dr. Monique Giroux, co-founder of the Englewood-based Movement and NeuroPerformance Center of Colorado, which takes a holistic approach to helping patients and their families. Indeed, one in five family caregivers suffers from depression, according to the National Center on Caregiving. And 17 percent of the 65 million Americans – many of them baby boomers – that serve as unpaid caregivers said their health was "fair to poor," compared with 13 percent of the general population, according to a 2009 report by the National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP. Here are a few tips to caregivers for staying emotionally and physically well: Dr. Monique Giroux, left, and Sharon Gordon, above, say caregivers of the ill and disabled must make focusing on themselves a priority. Reframe your relationship Create quality together time Set carepartner ground rules Plan ahead Shift your perspective, and view caregiving as "carepartnering," says Giroux, explaining that relationships often lose fullness in light of illness or injury. For example, if you're a husband caring for your wife, recognize the value she brings to the relationship. If you are a wife being cared for, respect your husband's needs and do what you can to maintain your health. This empowers both parties and can reduce stress, resentment and other negative feelings. If you feel like you are nagging your aging mother to do her physical-therapy exercises, then she might think so, too. Then you both end up frustrated. Giroux suggests coming up with a catch phrase your mom can use if she's just too tired one day, such as "I'd rather have a cup of coffee." You know she's acknowledged the reminder, but you respect her response and move on. Don't let illness or injury spoil your relationship. "Find moments where you can be together that represent the relationship that was, and still is," Giroux says. For Gordon, even though ALS zapped her husband's energy and made speech difficult, they find couple and family time watching TV together or going for walks. "I'll push him in the wheelchair, and my daughter will walk the dog." Anticipate problems with your caregiving role and create possible solutions, so you don't feel out of control when and if those problems occur. Plan for the long-term as well, Giroux advises. What will happen if you no longer can care for your loved one? What resources are available to help? Ask your medical provider to connect you with a nurse or social worker to discuss these issues. Health and Wellness Magazine • 59