Black Sheep

To say that 2020 didn't turn out the way I expected would be an understatement. A year ago at this time I had just been diagnosed with throat cancer and was undergoing chemo and radiation treatments that made it impossible for me to eat, speak, or drink. Shortly afterwards, I went through a second divorce. Then the pandemic hit, drastically changing the way I interacted with students in my job as a high school math teacher. There were times early in my cancer battle when I wasn't sure how I could ever feel joy again. After the divorce, I felt like a failure and wasn't sure how God could ever use me to minister to others. Yet I clung to the promise that God had given me in Jeremiah 29:11— that he had plans to "prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future." I started a daily gratitude journal and joined two women's Bible studies. The real turning point was when I decided to embark on a solo cross- country summer motorcycle trip to Washington, DC to celebrate life and to see my older son. I had had my motorcycle license for only two years and was concerned about how I would handle being alone. But I was determined to see Ethan and to learn to live life to the fullest, with or without a riding partner. Part of what gave me the courage to embark on such an epic trip alone was my growing faith. As a Christian, I had known about the three parts of the trinity for years—God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit, but I only had a vague understanding of the Holy Spirit. In my women's studies I had been learning that the Holy Spirit is a very real presence in my life—speaking to me, praying for me, and teaching me. It was so comforting for me to realize that I am never really alone. Bolstered by my growing understanding of God's presence in my life as well as the support of many Black Sheep, HOG, and Facebook friends, I left West Linn, Oregon on July 1, 2020, headed for the East Coast. Over the course of my eight- week trip I ended up riding over 15,000 miles through more than a dozen national parks, completing two certified endurance rides, and conquering some of the more challenging roads in the country. I spent several days with my son, met many wonderful people, and enjoyed dozens of delicious meals. Most importantly, though, were the positive life lessons I learned along the way. On the first leg of my trip, I learned that although I was traveling on my own, I did not feel alone. Completing my first endurance ride from Custer, South Dakota to Niagara Falls, NY in a day and a half taught me that I am stronger than I realize, then seeing my son in DC made me aware that I was blessed beyond measure. Successfully handling mechanical problems, navigating through significant road construction on the Blue Ridge Parkway, and conquering the Tail of the Dragon gave me confidence in my skills as a rider. As I left Tennessee, outrunning thunderstorms on my second endurance ride from Monterey to Silverton, Colorado I became more convinced about my ability to overcome obstacles. Exploring the mountains of Colorado, riding the Million Dollar Highway, and touring Rocky Mountain National Park I realized that I could literally and figuratively experience new heights of Joy. After deciding to take on the triple-digit heat of Utah to visit seven national parks in seven days, I learned that embracing difficulties can result in finding unexpected treasures. I also learned from my visits with friends from my younger years and familiar destinations in California, that while my past may have helped create me, it did not have to define me. On the last leg of my trip, as I put in almost 1,500 miles in just two days, I took the time to contemplate the benefits of living life with no regrets. It turned out that my cross-country trip was just the "wind therapy" I needed. God used my time on the bike and my experiences along the way to teach me that I had completely misunderstood how he sees me. When I was focusing on my mistakes and failures, he was focusing on the character he wanted to develop in me. Where I saw defeat and

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